wedding etiquette walking the bride down the isle?
April 4, 2010 by admin
Filed under Wedding Etiquette Question
Related Products:
what is the wedding etiquette regarding father and step-father walking bride down the isle? Stepfather has been more of a father than the father but bride doesn’t want to hurt anyones feelings.
Related Products:
Whomever the bride wants she should choose. She just needs to explain it to whomever she doesn’t choose so that they aren’t hurt.
I walked down the Aisle by myself.
i was sort of in the same situation when i was planning my wedding.. i am very close with my stepdad.. and not at all with my real dad.. so i didnt invite my dad at all… and had my stepdad walk me down the isle! i mean it depends on your situatin too b/c my dad wasnt there for me at all and my stepdad was, and i just call my real dad a sperm donor.. b/c thats all he gave to me! but there is no specific ettiqutte that is going to tell you what to do and not to.. i mean for other things there’s a book.. but not really for this issue! go with your heart! its your day.. and it has to be special for you! good luck!
could the father arrive with the bride in the wedding car, and the step dad walk the aisle? Or father one side, step father the other? OR the father walks the bride down the aisle, the step father takes over and gives the bride away to the groom? So the stepfather waits the opposite side of the aisle, and passes the brides hand over, so the step father gives the bride away, but she is walked down the aisle by her father?
A nice way to make sure there isn’t any hurt feelings is to let one of them walk her down the aisle and one have the father/daughter dance with her. Since her stepfather has been more of a father to her, it might be nice to let him choose which he prefers.
I think it is up to the bride which she would rather have walk her. Traditionally, the actual father should walk her, but that was before remarriage was an option.
In some cases, I have seen brides have both parents walk her down the aisle, one taking each arm. Perhaps this could be an option for you?
Now days etiquette is what ever you want. Walk alone, walk with dad, walk with step dad, walk with both, walk with mom.. Just remember if you choose only 1 dad the other will be hurt if you don’t handle the situation properly.
A tricky one – I’d maybe avoid this altogether and get the bride’s best male friend/brother or cousin to walk her down the aisle. Both men should understand that it’s a difficult situation – and if the bride explains then no-one can get offended. On the other hand – it’s the Bride and Groom’s day – and it should be whatever the Bride really wants to do – I think we can sometimes think far too much about other people’s feelings and not about our own. All the best whatever you decide.
If she doesn’t want hurt feelings, walk with both dads . . . one on each side.
Do both a father/daughter dance and a stepdad/daughter dance.
There is no need to hurt anyone. I admire brides who don’t use this as an opportunity to punish a parent.
I completely agree with carolina…
One can walk you the other can dance with you,
Or you can walk on your own… (i did this. my father couldnt make it and was devestaded and my step father was present) in order to not hurt my real father’s feelings i simply chose to walk down alone.. it worked out fine. then i danced with my step father a song so he ould feel left out… In the end i honored my real father by not giving his “spot” away.
It’s just a walk… it’s not a big deal if you do it alone. If it was me I would do it alone to spare my real father’s feelings. If he is THERE, at the ceremony, he may be offended. I also wouldn’t have a father-daughter dance.. If you’re not having a mother-daughter dance whats the loss with not having a father-daughter dance.. lol.. Just my opinion!
Just keep all feelings in check when you are making your decisions is all. I told you what I would do.
If the bride wants to walk with both of them, she would have one on each side.
The bride can pick, there’s no rules anymore. You can have both
I am in the EXACT same situation. The place we’re holding our wedding at doesn’t have enough space for all three of us to walk down the aisle together (which is what I origionally thought would be the most fair), so we had to consider other “solutions.” My stepdad is a good sport and offered to give up his spot for my Dad, but I wouldn’t feel good about excluding him in that way. So my mom and I sat down and talked and we thought it’ll be best if I walk myself down the aisle. I think it’s the most appropriate thing to do in my situation and it’s suprisingly common. Especially for brides who aren’t living at home during the time they’re prepairing for their wedding. Now if I can just figure out how to do the father/dauther dance without hurting anyone’s feelings I’ll be good-to-go.
My sister had both our father and stepfather walk her down the aisle and no one’s feelings were hurt.
Bride is going to hurt someone’s feelings no matter what. It is possible for both of them to walk her down the aisle. She might even ask her mother, if that’s still possible.
I think you’ve gotten a lot of good answers here. There is no “right” way to do this, really. The bride can walk alone, both father and stepfather can walk with her (I think that would be really lovely if it works and everyone is cool with it!) or one could do the walking and the other get the first dance.
I will note that this is, in a way, a “good” problem to have. My father died the year before my (first) wedding. My brother walked me down the aisle and cried the whole way. My second wedding…I walked alone.
How about Grandfather? That’s a happy medium. But father and step-dad will need an explanation either way. Someone will be hurt, but love conquers all. OR, maybe they can both walk her. Lots more people are straying away from the traditional etiquitte anyway.
Either walk with your mother or both men.